insight

Was that my Sveta?

Tonight a war has begun!

I’m sitting in front of the TV. Terrible pictures are running.

I can’t believe my eyes. I turned on the radio. The news on the radio is even more terrifying.

I closed the windows and doors firmly.

Through the window I saw Sveta. 

Is it possible that it is her? 

She stands for a while in front of the window.

I get up from my armchair to see her and she is gone.

Our whole life together rans before my eyes. I missed her.

Was that my Sveta?

I started the painting at the day I heard the news “A war has begun in Ukraine”. 24.2.2020.

I grabbed a canvas and made some quick coloured marks. Quick scratch.

I knew what I saw and felt.

I saw the red curtains in his living room, the beautiful bouquet of tulips, the small wooden table. I saw a middled-aged man sitting frozen in his armchair, after hearing and seeing the news. Than he saw Sveta by the window. He got up immediately, to see her closely, but she is gone.

Than I remember that I saw a reflation of a man’s face, blurry, fare from the window, behind Sveta’s shoulder.

Was it the middled-aged man’s reflection on the window, when he got up from his armchair?

Or was it the man that accompanied Sveta?

I drew the man’s face reflected in the window, it felt right.

I thought I finished the painting, and left it for a while.

Over time, in February 2023, a year after I started the painting, it was clear to me that there was a moment when Sveta looked straight ahead, looked directly into the man’s face and he looked at her.

There was a clear meeting – face to face of the two, for a split second, and then she disappeared.